<< But at least I am not claiming to be the holder of an objective, universal,
eternal moral standard.>>
STOP THE PRESSES! RE-DO PAGE ONE! HEADLINE: "RUSSELL STEWART ADMITS
MATERIALIST MORALITY IS NOT OBJECTIVE, UNIVERSAL OR ETERNAL. CYBERSPACE
STUNNED."
INTERNET (AP)--Russell Stewart, self-described atheist, stunned the
cyber-world today by admitting he does not hold "an objective, universal,
eternal moral standard." Aghast reflectorites dropped their collective chins,
as they had for weeks been explaining why a materialist cannot make claims of
moral duty that apply to all people. Stewart had been fighting, many say
illogically, to deny the consequences of his philosophy. With today's
admission, that is no longer possible.
Jim Bell, one of many adversaries Stewart has faced, commented, "It's
been a long, rather frustrating debate. But we have finally established the
point that began this entire dialogue, namely, that materialist morality
cannot condemn other people's behavior. That is because, by definition, it is
not objective, universal or eternal." Bell, celebrating at his home, is
considering a run for national office.